cairns

Strange that while I have been off work I have read two books on forgiving acts that seem unforgivable, one by Volf with a broad theological and philosophical treatment and one by Gobodo-Madikizela that is anecdotal.  I ordered one.  My wife bought the other.  Both were selected before the events of the last long week.

All of the hurdles have been crossed except for this one: how do you deal with a daughter who seems to have totally changed from the child you raised?  Where does a person lose empathy for the results of their acts on others?  How does a dearly loved child turn on you in the most vicious ways and then act like nothing happened?  Can she really believe the unbelievable?  Is there a serious internal problem, or just teenage turmoil?  Maybe a doctor’s visit today will have some answers.

One thing I know, the timing of two accounts of how the cross brings us to the ability to forgive what we could never have imagined, is NO accident.  I need them both.  No academic exercise here today.  We are full force into reality of faith and life on this chaotic mud ball!  Time for faith to work.  Time for forgiveness to be real.  Time to find healing and a healthy path forward.  There are no alternatives.

peace

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Has it only been a week?  A false accusation from a totally unexpected direction and a surprise visit from CPS, a very difficult family meeting, a cancer scare for my wife, surgery Wednesday, planned trip to visit a college with my youngest tomorrow, closest prayer partners to get through it all everywhere on the planet — except right here where I live.

I do not care how flawed human beings and their churches are.  This week makes one thing (of many things) very clear.  We need each other.

peace

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All other body blow, knock you down obstacles this week have been met and overcome by the power of God’s collective family praying. Thank you my church, my friends, indeed my family. Grace abounds.
peace

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pray!

Court date with daughter who totalled my little two door RAV4 this afternoon to resolve the ticket she got, scary doctor visit with wife tomorrow, depending on the outcome of that, my sinus surgery on Wednesday morning, and still have to finish with authorities for false claim of child abuse.

If that sounds like an attack, with major body blows, it is.  So the response is pray for peace in the midst, tangible presence of God in the midst, and victory!

peace

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Just started reading Miroslav Volf’s book by this title. As I begin his thoughts on identity and our relationship to “the other,” accompanied by terms like “communal violence,” I am thinking how tragic it is that what the New Testament church declared to have disappeared in Christ is still causing violence and mayhem across the planet today. I’m looking forward to his analysis of how we respond to anyone we consider to be other and to see if he presents any pathway to hope.

Wednesday evening:  Well into chapter one now.  The introduction alone was worth buying the book!  This is going to be a very interesting read.

Thursday evening: “Sin is here the kind of purity that wants the world cleansed of the other rather than the heart cleansed of the evil that drives people out by calling those who are clean “unclean” and refusing to help make clean those who are unclean.”

peace

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Just spent a week of fever, trying to think, trying not to think, and watching too much news and TV.  Most of the feverish part was beyond comprehension.  But, then I began to notice more and more how I was observing reports and entertainment of a world that makes no sense to me.

Then, one night desperate for something that wasn’t garbage I watched an hour on George Beverly Shea, of Billy Graham fame.  It was typical Gaither “enjoy this? buy this!” material.  But, I love that voice and those old songs.  (I was surprised to see which ones were actually new when I was learning them as a child!)  Problem was those historic clips from the seventies.  I know those people!  I understand those people, like some of them and am glad to have escaped some of them, but they make sense to me.

And it dawned on me that I am a child of Vietnam, Camelot, TV Crusades, Woodstock, Assassinations, Bible prophecy, Young Life, Cold War, Space Race, and so much more from a time most of the people I now work with have no knowledge of, and definitely no connection to.  And, I wonder why I do not understand their actions, beliefs, apparent ignorance of conventional manners and civility, self focus……

Its official.  I woke up from my fever in future shock.  The only comfort is that Doc and Toffler explained it to me a long time ago…

What it leaves me to wonder is how does anybody play the elder role well in a society changing so fast that today’s generation gap makes the sixties look like play time?

peace

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The kids did great.  They took the math test with confidence in spite of teachers all over the place saying that the material covered is too hard.  Just took their time and answered everything they knew.  I hate doing tests when we could be learning so much instead, especially since we already know who can do what. But, the kids took it right in stride.

Near the end of the second session today, I looked over at one of the girls.  She was frustrated, but working until she was sure she had done all she knew, then switched to reading a library book.  At the beginning of the year, she froze up completely when confronted with tests or difficult assignments.  Now she competes with the identified gifted kids.  Forget the fact that others have more than she does, she is becoming resilient.  I know what I need to know.  She is going to be fine.

We finished up, had lunch, discussed serious issues of the Vietnam War (and Sam’s book), then started playing with Newton’s laws of motion.  My little charges were engaged, interested, and shifted into full gear on each part of the day.  What a gift to hang out with kids!

peace

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A sixth grader in the building for after school daycare came in my room, over to my desk where I was fuming with an uncooperative computer and a too large stack of papers to grade, came around the desk and gave me a shoulder hug. He was with me for two years as a gifted student before the system sent him on to middle school as a special education student. Here is to seeing the gifts in all our children expressed with gratitude for a clean card given back to me today. peace

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Sometimes its better to watch. My school system has already reversed itself. In less than a year and half we have changed from every classroom teaching the exact same material on the same day, to map out the year so that you cover all the standards. And by the way, use the horrible books we charged the families $100+ per child to rent as little as possible.

My daughter has gone from abducted by a very real servant of the enemy and only escaping after calling forth the physical strength to begin hurting him, to being picked up by a girl who used to harass her severely about her Christian beliefs so that she could be present for her baptism (at a church where one of my Masters students is one of the pastors!)
My wife has gone from gung ho mega church woman, to why bother.
My university is getting ready to overhaul our whole program to stay on the marketing edge, with due lip service to staying on the educational forefront.
My new security light goes off every night and I rollover and go back to sleep because there is nothing I am going to do about it if there is somebody out there anyway. ANd my holly tree does a great imitation of an intruder according to the light! lol
The tiny gathering we have now tried twice is interactive service with a wife who wants to be silent and anonymous in a group of ten. Our mega church makes it more obvious all the time that the spirit of American business hold a place nearly equal to the Spirit of God Almighty in their actual practice.
I have a month to wait for sinus surgery to try and stop regular use of mild narcotics to sleep or function.
My book remains a dream, but rants fill my blog (you should know the ones I don’t publish!)
But my fourth graders are learning more everyday, including how to use knowledge, and how the allegories of CS Lewis relate to things their parents are trying to teach them at home. Many many little ones, especially minority kiddos in this middle class setting come to me for hugs and acceptance. My Masters students seem to be honestly enjoying the task of envisioning schools that would actually allow the pursuit of Truth.
SO, today I won’t rant. I will sit here in a world that contains villains and saints, abusers and innocents, hope and despair and watch through eyes of faith. Where will the Spirit move today? What little move on my part might tip the scale?
peace

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